Can one person really make a difference? I ask myself that question sometimes when I have doubts that anything I do in an effort to help someone else in need is welcomed or helpful. The Minister at our church says one person can make a difference one person at a time and not to get caught up in the big numbers of those in need. I wonder if we tell ourselves this to feel justified in how little we do or if it really is true. Does the calculation of pay-it-forward really apply?
I spend time thinking about how I can be a servant to others. I think about the experiences I have had or blessings I have in my life and how to utilize those to guide or help others. I don't know how else to justify our existence. I can't rationalize why some live long lives and others don't. I don't know why some people are born in a place of poverty and others not. I don't know what the purpose of living is if some just seem to be born to suffer. If I think too hard about it it becomes too confusing. It is painful to listen to the news on a day like today and hear about six people who gave up a good life in America to go to another country to help save lives only to be murdered while doing so. Why? I have a difficult time processing this reality. I won't lie, I really struggle at times with my faith because of it. I am only assuming like other Christians who are plagued with these questions you press on and do the best you can. So, I do.
I haven't packed a bag and moved to another country to help the needy nor have I taken a short trip to do so. I have sponsored one child in one country with a small donation each month. Is that enough? Is throwing money at a cause the same as giving your time? I don't know. I don't welcome the homeless into my home to shower or sleep, nor do I stop in traffic to toss out money or food. I go one time a month for seven months now to one shelter and serve food to the homeless. Is that enough? I don't know. I grew three people in my body and am trying to raise the two who are still with me into good servants. Is that enough? I don't know. I provide gifts and unsolicited advice to mothers who have newborns in the hospital in critical care. I have spoken three times to a classroom of hospital employees learning bereavement about the most difficult time in my life to help them be better hospital staff. I facilitate a support group for struggling moms with challenging ADHD children. Does any of it matter? I hope so.
Can I justify that this is enough? The question is enough for what? Who decides what is enough? All I know to do is continue to challenge myself on how to demonstrate love and kindness to others. That should be enough.
