You didn't get to meet me today but I did get a good look at you. It's a shame we didn't meet because it didn't give you the chance to beg me to move to LA with you. I'm not in love with you and you don't know I exist but that shouldn't matter. You see, on the way to Walmart to get a glance at you, (and buy groceries) my two sons and I were making plans for when we moved in with you and shared your millions of dollars. We came up with lots of ways to help you spend your our money. Dylan, the son I would leave behind at the airport, promised not to embarrass me so we would have a shot at going home with you. I didn't want to hurt his feelings but he wouldn't be coming along with us, just in case you were concerned with the responsibility a wife and two sons would require. I must apologize in advance that my sons don't think you are as great as their real father but they will grow to find you amusing I'm sure. I imagine your mansion is so big you wouldn't notice if I brought my husband along too.
Anyway, when you are ready for us to join you we'll catch the next flight. BTW, I loved your shirt and suit jacket, very nice ensemble.
Your potentially adequate housemates,
Linda and the boys
December 12, 2010
So funny! I missed Will at Walmart. If he takes you, don't forget your friends. I will be your housekeeper. I'm sure you will have several so you won't notice I'm really bad at that. I don't want to live in LA.. so I'll commute out twice a month to "clean" your house. Sounds like a plausible plan to me!
Kim